Warm Up for the Week

I'm not really sure why, but yesterday and today I've had a real sense of anxiety of procrastination on jobs that I know I should or could get done, and a feeling of impending disaster. This morning I have nothing to worry about well i do i mean i'm, i'm thinking about my procedure on Wednesday and perhaps that's what's bugging me, but I think it also goes a bit further and it has something to do with my fear of saying yes or no to anything or anyone. I'm dreading telling Diane, that I can't, I'm not coming to the wedding reception. And I'm too immobilized because of that to buy the tickets for our bus. I just feel like everything is going to fall apart. I worry because Tom's feeling so good that it's going to end, fairly soon and then we'll be back to this feeling of, you know, in mobility between all three of us. And I know that it doesn't help me to feel this way it doesn't it doesn't the construct is just makes me do last, but there are just days like this where I can't describe or talk myself out of a mood that is mostly in my head. If I would approach each day with I'll do my best. And breathe away the rest. Then, it could be a much more pleasant existence for me. I try my hardest to not take on feelings of guilt or dread, but it's just seems to be part of my human nature and I'm sure I'm not alone. But I just felt like if I talked about it, and lived through it verbally maybe I could cope with it better.