When I finished the week, I felt a little sad, because this was a summer of great growth for me. Now I have to go back into my routine of work, and not let it box me in as I use my hope and faith about the future to keep me refreshed. It was hard work being part of the Dance Institute this summer, but it was also so exciting to have new opportunities. Much of the time, I feel a sense of ageism in the culture, which I push against. But I feel a sense of being over, when growth mindset means the learning never stops. At Lincoln Center, I felt a part of the continuum of learning. Whenever I am in the throes of learning and teaching, I feel that others look at me as though I am over. But that is a feeling and feelings aren't the reality. I need to remind myself that it is the case. Looking over the summer I felt confident about my growth, even when I felt shaky about the competition for attention. That is my big flaw; I love reinforcement, I want to be liked. This year is going to be a time for me to saying to the feelings that I have, that they are just that, feelings. Feelings have no power over a person if they are given voice and accepted. I hear you voices of judgement, but you have no power over me. I recognize, that my feelings have given me a huge advantage in the arts, but sometimes they take over for me and don't allow me to feel all that I am doing is full of power and grace. I am worthy.
